Hey Hey Johnny

lennon-coke

Is he snorting Coke? Well, whatever gets him through the night…

Did you know that there are only 20 more shopping days left until Christmas?  What, you don’t care?  Good!  That means your mind isn’t focused on whiny wish lists from bratty kids, insane shoppers or horrible holiday muzak.  And you should have plenty of brain cells left for your weekly Monday present that can only be found in the great big Santa sack we like to call the Dusty Vinyl Archive!  DJ Scratchy (the middle one in Santa’s “Ho! Ho! Ho!”) is ready to rock December with another forgotten hit for all of you readers who are on The Nice List like the Sponkies.  No need to keep the receipt for this one, earworms are the gift that keep on giving…

dusty vinyl

Monday December 8, 1980.  A day that will live in music infamy due to the shocking murder of former Beatle John Lennon.  Being one of the most influential rock artists of all time, Lennon’s death had a major impact not only on music fans everywhere, but the many musicians themselves who considered John an mentor and a contemporary.  In the years following Lennon’s assassination, the radio airwaves were flooded with musical tributes that were penned by some of the most famous artists of the day.  Who says you have to be a rapper caught up in the violent East/West turf war to get your own collection of memorial songs written about you?

Does this clown think he's bigger than Biggie? Man, I don't think so...

Does this hippie clown think he’s more popular than Biggie now? Man, I don’t think so…

Unfortunately…… most of the John Lennon tribute songs sucked giant Yoko balls.  Sure, they were a nice gesture… and would maybe be great to play at a funeral for the right ambiance.  But who would want to listen to Elton John whining about playing in an empty garden 36 years after everyone has forgotten the poignant reason he wrote that piece of crap in the first place?  Thankfully, John’s ex-bandmate George Harrison (Who himself died 15 years ago last week, making this earworm double timely) came along to release a Lennon tribute that can still jam on the airwaves in 2016…. well, assuming anyone bothered to actually play it anymore.  Here is the Quiet Beatle’s awesome 1981 #2 hit, “All Those Years Ago”…

This, I believe, is the way John Lennon would want to be remembered…. not with some schmaltzy, tear-jerking, beyond mellow garbage that makes “Imagine” sound like a power ballad…

Sorry, Yoko, but your tribute just resulted in even more deaths...

Sorry, Yoko, but your tribute just resulted in even more deaths…

It turns out that “All Those Years Ago” marked the first time all living members of the Beatles appeared on the same song recording since the band broke up in 1970.  This song, with different lyrics, was originally written by George for Ringo… and the two recorded it together just weeks before Lennon’s murder.  Ringo, whose musical tastes are as wide and completely random as my own, didn’t like the song… so George took it back and decided to use it as the basis for his tribute to John with Ringo’s drumming still on the track.  Paul McCartney added backing vocals to make this the most Beatlistic recording the world had seen in a decade…

And this is the most Beatlistic photo I have in The Nest's image archive.

And this is the most Beatlistic photo I have in The Nest’s image archive.

I’ll be back with another song from the dead next Monday…

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Squirrels To The Rescue

You rang?

You rang?

I don’t know about you, but I could definitely go for something a little more smile-inducing sqturday squirrel logoafter all of the bad news this week.  And there’s no better distraction to the ugly world around us than a super cute squirrel!  Thank God It’s Saturday!

This squirrel may not exactly be smiling himself, but that’s OK… he’s still capable of giving viewers the warm fuzzies.  Maybe that alien looking notch someone carved in his ear may have something to do with his mood, though.  Geez, that’s uglier than those giant plugs some humans put in their earlobes…

Happy Saturday Squirrel Day everyone… and have a great weekend!

Posted in Saturday Squirrel | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

Up Up And Away

flywithme1

SCRAT: This was a great idea to go camping tonight, Fuzzy!

CHIP: Yep…. good buds, bitter beer, the great indoors.  It doesn’t get any better than this!

FUZZYWIG: Oh, it will definitely get better!  Just wait until 4:20….

This serene, manly critter camping scene was suddenly interrupted by something falling out of the sky and into their campfire…

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SCRAT: It’s a UFO!!!!  Grab your nuts and RUN!!!!!!!!!!!

CHIP: That’s no alien spacecraft… that’s just a cat in a balloon.  The feline version of Steve Fossett.

FUZZYWIG: HEY!!!  Be a little more careful where you’re landing that thing!  Don’t you know that only YOU can prevent forest fires?

SAMMY: Sorry everyone… didn’t mean to cause a ruckus.  I’m getting one last grand tour of the world before I head off for the Rainbow Bridge.  I’d heard a lot of great things about The Nest from my friend Bashful, and was curious to check this place out for myself.

SCRAT: Bashful said great things about us?

FUZZYWIG: Don’t believe any of it!  Not a single thing he said is true!

CHIP: Well anyway, welcome to our shelf here at The Nest, Sammy.

SAMMY: Thanks guys!  I’ll go looking around now….

Meanwhile…. a little further down the road….

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TINA: W00t!  I rolled a twelveteen!  My little elf just totally assimilated your pathetic wizard!

SCRATCHY: Dammit, this is why I hate playing Bottom Shelves And Dragons!

TWILIGHT: As Bottom Shelf Master, I shall now summon the next enemy…

AJ: Oh wow, Sugarcube, you got great summonin’ skills!  Here they come now!

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SAMMY: Greetings, ponies!  It’s Sammy passing through…

TINA: YAY!  Fresh meat!  Prepare to be defeated!

TWILIGHT: Welcome Sammy!  Where are you headed.

SAMMY: I’m on my world tour before I retire to the Rainbow Bridge.

SCRATCHY: Careful about those bridges… you know they’re infested with trolls!

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SAMMY: No, that’s not the Rainbow Bridge!  It looks more like this…

rainbowbridge

AJ: Oooooooooh!  That’s perty!!!

SAMMY: Well, it was nice meeting you all!  I’ll be on my way to see more of your friends….

LUNA: HALT!  Who is this interloper in my domain!?!?

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SAMMY: Oh, you must be Luna!  Nice to meet…

LUNA: That’s PRINCESS Luna to you, airborne peasant!

SAMMY: Well, then you can call me Prince Samuel of Catagonia then, Your Majesty!  I humbly request permission to explore your kingdom here.

SCRATCHY: Back off, Looney!  You don’t scare anybody around here anymore…

LUNA: Hmph!  This is no way to talk to a Goddess… but I guess I shall allow you passage.  Just stay out of the castle’s airspace…

With Luna’s generous blessing, Sammy continued on his journey of the land of the shelf critters…

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SPONKIE 1: HAHA!!!  We’ve got you now, Pokemon!

SPONKIE 2: Yeah!  Say your Pokeprayers before we capture you as our own!

SHADOW: (Chuckling to himself) Oh, these kids.  They always think they can get the upper hand on a clever umbreon like myself.  Why don’t you two bored little sparklecorns turn around and capture the critter hovering behind you instead?

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SPONKIE 1: You think we’re stupid enough to fall for that distraction?

SPONKIE 2: (Readies the Pokeball) Fat chance, nuclear reactor!  You’re ours now!

SAMMY: Hi guys!

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SPONKIE 1: Wow!  It’s a kitty in a balloon!

SAMMY: Hope I wasn’t interrupting anything important.

SPONKIE 2: Naw, we were just ready to capture this stupid Poke…. (turns around)  Aw, POOP!!!

SPONKIE 1: He got away!  Drat!  We’ll catch that thing, yet!

SAMMY: Sorry if I was any trouble.  I’m just passing through on my tour of the world!

SPONKIE 2: No worries, mate!  Hey, have you been to Uluru, Australia yet?

SAMMY: I don’t think so.  Can you tell me how to get there by balloon?

SPONKIE 1: Not a problem!  Just turn around!

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SAMMY: COOL!  How many critters can say they’ve seen it snow in Australia?  Thanks a lot, friends!  I’ll be on my way now….

A little farther on down the road….

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BUSTER: Well, what do we have here?

SAMMY: I’m Sammy, and I’m checking out the world before I head over to the Rainbow Bridge!

BUSTER: Hey, I’ve been to the Bridge myself many, many times!  They keep kicking me out, though…. probably all of that gas I get from living off roadkill and thrown away Big Macs…

SAMMY: Awesome!  Maybe you can help lead me there…

BUSTER: Sure thing, kiddo!  First off….

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MITZI: OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  You are so KYUUUUUUUUUUUUTE!!!!!

BUSTER: (From underneath the Mitzi’s massive, silicone enhanced chest) Oooooooooooh, my spleen!

SAMMY: Thank you!  And you are quite the attractive horsie, yourself!

MITZI: Awwwwwwwww, I’ll bet you say that to all the bimbocorns!  Wanna, like, stick around and get a few drinks?

SAMMY: I’d love to, but I can’t.  Gotta see the world before the Rainbow Bridge comes calling my name.  It was nice meeting you, though!

MITZI: You’re such a sweetie weetie cutie pie!!!  Let Mitzi give you a big ol’ buh-bye kiss!!!

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As Sammy continued on his journey through the shelf, he ran into many of The Nest’s other well-known denizens…

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And some lesser known critters…

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And some truly bizarre creatures…

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SAMMY: Wow, so you’re really a rainbow dinosaur?

RAINBOW DINOSAUR: RAWR!!!

After seeing all there was to see at The Nest, Sammy prepared to lift off for the next destination on his global trip.  But there was one small problem….

SAMMY: Oh no!  I seem to have lost a lot of the hot air in my balloon!  I won’t be able to get off the ground like this!

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RAINY: You have no hot air in your balloon?  That’s a coincidence, I have no rain in my rain gauge.

SAMMY: I’ll bet I could get you some genuine Rainbow Bridge rain if you could tell me where I can find enough hot air to fly my balloon!

RAINY: Hmmmmmmmm, I have an idea….

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SAMMY: Are you sure this kind of “hot air” is going to work in my balloon?

RAINY: Are you serious?  Did you know they flew the Hindenberg all the way across the Atlantic Ocean on skunk gas?

SAMMY: Ummmmm, didn’t the Hindenberg….

RAINY: Bon voyage, and don’t forget my rain!

SAMMY: I won’t!  (Waves to Rainy) Thank you so much for all your help!!!!!

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Fuzzywig’s dog Fleabag joins Rainy in bidding Sammy adieu from The Nest….

FLEABAG: BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK! BARK…..

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RAINY: BAD DOG!!!!


Today’s episode of Shelf Critter Theatre was part of a Blog Hop put together to allow bloggers from all over the world to pay tribute to the ailing Sammy from One Spoiled Cat.  The concept was to introduce Sammy to someplace in our world where he would have liked to visit, and I hope he enjoyed the tour he was given of The Nest!  Sadly, the Rainbow Bridge came calling for Sammy on the same day as this tribute was scheduled… so for a second straight day, I must say goodbye to another of my anipal bloggers who has left us.  Happy travels, Sammy, and I know you will always be with us in spirit!

flywithme

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Evil Squirrel’s Nest Comic #240 — 12/1/16

comic120116

Along with the rest of the many friends they have made in the blogging community, our hearts at The Nest go out to the Staff at Easy Blog on the sudden, shocking and way too soon passing of their beloved weimaraner Easy.  I was fortunate enough to get to follow the adventures Easy and his parents had at his “crib” for the past two and a half years, and enjoyed the comments he always left on my blog.  Like everyone else whose heart was touched by Easy over the years, I will miss him dearly and wish him safe travels over the Rainbow Bridge…

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More Pussy

Slurp, slurp, slurp...

Slurp, slurp, slurp…

It’s Picture Day Wednesday…. and hey, no giggling at Biskit!  Don’t knock it until you’ve picture daytried it.  If we were all as flexible as cats, we’d all do it as well.  Don’t deny it…

It’s been a couple of weeks since I found out Ody somehow contracted my family’s medical plague of diabetes, and since I gratuitously use my cute animals to try and attract more people to my blog, I figured you might want an update on that situation…

Starting off with low doses of insulin didn’t seem to be doing a whole lot of good.  With each weekly checkup, his blood sugar steadily rose from 337 to 345 to…… gulp, 500-and something nasty.  BTW, if you want the nastiest possible litter box, find yourself a cat with a blood sugar well over the legal limit…

Thankfully, Ody's lardass days are over...

Thankfully, Ody’s lardass days are over…

To make matters even worse… after that dreaded visit (which was the Monday before last), my frustrated-with-being-dragged-to-the-vet-every-week cat decided to make a run for it when we got home.  Out the garage door he went, and I unsuccessfully tried to chase him around the house… losing him in the backyard.  It was cold, and my strictly indoor cat who was an eyelash from going into a sugar coma decided to run and hide from me.  To add insult to injury and really piss me off, he was costing me my much needed beauty sleep since I had to wake up in the middle of the afternoon for the appointment…

Awwwww, ain't that too fucking bad!!!

Awwwww, ain’t that too fucking bad!!!

After over two hours of waiting up to see if he’d finally come crawling back to my door, he finally showed up where I least expected him…. at the kitchen door.  He must’ve found a hell of a place to hide in my garage, because I’d checked there and inside the house to make sure he didn’t circle around and run back inside.  After beating his ass giving him a stern lecture, I started Ody on his new, much higher dose of insulin.  The water guzzling stopped, and his blood sugar was a much better 136 this past Monday.  Ody went to this appointment in my jail cell pet carrier to thwart any more escape attempts from Stalag 13, and somehow that bastard knew it was vet day because he instantly hid as soon as I started the car…

Well, the good news for Ody is he doesn’t have to be checked again for a whole month…

The bad news is, him and Biskit are both due for their yearly shots in a couple weeks!

That's it... I'm going to start destroying all of these stupid things ES likes...

That’s it… I’m going to start destroying all of these stupid things ES likes…

I’ll have more adventures from hell next Wednesday…

Posted in Picture Day | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 22 Comments