Spanning The Globe

No peeking now while I head to the potty!  Heh Heh Heh!!!

No peeking now while I head to the potty! Heh Heh Heh!!!

So it’s been 5 weeks since I last posted a Flashback Friday post on my blog.  “What in the hell is up with that?”, you ask yourself as you move that cursor over to the unfollow flashback fridaybutton.  Well, first it was just the time I had on Fridays, and now it’s the ideas, or lack thereof.  After almost 50 FF posts, I’ve reminisced on quite a bit of the past already… and while there’s still much, much more nostalgia out there waiting to be lampooned in The Nest’s familiar style… it’s getting hard to find topics I already know enough about or that I can quickly research, while also being something I can make funny and entertaining.  Flashback Friday certainly hasn’t run its course… but it will probably no longer be an every week feature.  I apologize in advance.

Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?

Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?

That said, me and one of my friends from that other internet place I hang out at were chatting it up a few days ago, and the subject of antipodes came up.  If you know what an antipode is, let me assure you they generally don’t come up very often in my everyday conversation… this had to do with a trivia question on a game show, which is still a pretty shitty excuse for talking about antipodes.

Yeah, I've just been spending the day calculating the antipodes of each room in my nest...

Yeah, I’ve just been spending the day calculating the antipodes of each room in my nest…

An antipode is the spot on the other side of the earth you would end up at if you were to travel in a straight line directly through the earth’s center.  For much of the US, our antipode is in that deathtrap known as the Indian Ocean.  If you believed those myths about digging a hole to China, well, be lucky you didn’t act on it or you would have drowned instead.

Hey!  I found the sweatshop that makes my doggie treats!

Hey! I found the sweatshop that makes my doggie treats!

As I was trying to figure out the antipodes of the four capital cities listed in the question as it was presented, I commented on how much easier it would be if I had a globe.  It then occurred to me that globes seem to have become one of the forgotten items of obsolescence.  When was the last time you saw a real, honest to goodness globe?

Hey, where's the firefox at?

Hey, where’s the firefox at?

I remember we used to sell globes at Mecca every year at Back To School time… but it’s probably been a decade since the last one rolled off of our shelves.  Kids don’t need globes anymore when they have instant access to all the maps they want on the internet.  A globe is kind of a bulky and awkward thing to have taking up space when it serves no purpose once kids get bored from spinning it around as fast as they can.

And you just thought it was your imagination that the days were getting faster.

And you just thought it was your imagination that the days were getting faster.

I wonder if they even have globes in classrooms anymore.  I kinda doubt it, but it’s been a while since I was in school.  The last time I was in a classroom, there were no computers to be found.  Teachers had to take the class to the computer lab if they wanted us to do things on the Apple IIe.  And nobody in the class had a cell phone.  When I was in school, the only cell phones were big enough to be considered weapons and banned…

Hmmmm, that gives me an idea for having smartphones classified as weapons to keep them out of schools... but that's for another post.

Hmmmm, that gives me an idea for having smartphones classified as weapons to keep them out of schools… but that’s for another post.

Remember those globes that had the physical ridges for the mountain ranges!  Those were a lot of fun to run your fingers across… unless I was the only one who ever had a globe mountain fetish.  These kind of globes came in handy for the blind if they were ever looking to traverse a difficult mountain range…

Oooh, I feel something sludgy!  I must have my fingers in Lake Erie!

Oooh, I feel something sludgy! I must have my fingers in Lake Erie!

Lastly, to give this post a real Flashback Friday feel, let’s take a look at the role globes played in the awesome music videos of the 80’s!

Annie Lennox had one to spin around in “Sweet Dreams”

I traveled the world and the seven seas, whatever those are...

I traveled the world and the seven seas, whatever those are…

Asia used one in the very underrated video for their very underrated song “Heat of the Moment”

Hurry up, Europe needs to use the globe for shameless self promotion too!

Hurry up, Europe needs to use the globe for shameless self promotion in their video too!

And the ever lovable Ringo has all kinds of fun with this globe in the video for Tom Petty’s “I Won’t Back Down”

Back off from my globe, Boogaloo!

Back off from my globe, Boogaloo!

And there you have it, a pseudo-Flashback Friday post on the good ol’ geography teaching aid, the globe!  Be sure to keep your globe on its 23 and a half degree axis, and store it in a cool, dry place.  No marking out countries we don’t like, scraping the ridges off the mountains, or doing donuts on the annalemma.  And study hard, because there will be a quiz on antipodes when you come back to class on Monday.

Geography geek fun for everyone!

Geography geek fun for everyone!

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About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
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18 Responses to Spanning The Globe

  1. djmatticus says:

    But I can’t swim!
    Okay, that’s not true… but, I do have a strong resolve to never find myself in that much open water….

  2. I love globes, especially the kind with the raised mountains. OK I HAD to look it up. There are a bunch of antipode calculators online. What fun. Mine is just south of Madagascar out beyond any normal shipping paths. That is fitting because I have a birthmark shaped like Madagascar on my left leg and I often feel like I’m way out there beyond normal paths of any kind. Thanks for the Friday fun trip around the globe!

    • One more thought… I would end up in the Indian Ocean. Would the water flow out and flood my neighborhood? If so, how long would it take. Something to think about before anyone starts digging.

      • The science involved is probably beyond what my little squirrel brain can handle. I know if you had a hole that went through the earth and dropped an object in it, it would drop to near the end of the hole, come back, drop down, come back… each time traveling a little less distance until it finally became suspended at the core (Assuming the earth’s center of gravity was at its exact center). How that would work if you drilled a hole through the ocean and had water continually rush through, I’m not too sure of.

        Just to be safe, I recommend not trying it….

  3. merbear74 says:

    Hey, Lake Erie is not sludgy….anymore.
    Yay, Ringo!!

    • Well, I would’ve known had I not gotten lost trying to find Lake Erie when I was in your area 5 years ago. I knew you would enjoy Ringo! Hell, who doesn’t enjoy Ringo?

  4. The Cutter says:

    I was hoping this was gonna be about Pee Wee’s Playhouse…but sure, globes are cool too.
    I don’t recall the last time I actually saw a real globe. I used to have one in my childhood bedroom, but I think my parents got rid of it when they moved.

    • Unfortunately, I bowled in a youth league on Saturday mornings back in the day, so Saturday morning cartoons of the 80’s are actually a bit of a weak spot for me. At some point in time, I will do a post on Pee Wee’s Big Adventure though… one of the best movies ever….

  5. fanrosa says:

    I liked the huge ass dictionary in the library that had to be supported on a big wooden stand because there was no way you could lift that puppy.

    Now I have to go on a thrift store hunt and pop some tags while I look for an old school globe….

    • YES!!! And that was the dictionary that had everything in it… even the rude words! Those little index fingerholes in the side of the pages… the mountain ridges of the huge ass library dictionary!

      Good luck bargain hunting, and say hi to Mack for me….

  6. Interesting stuff. Apparently New Zealand is Australia’s antipodes? Can you explain more about the map with the antipodes 1 and 2 on it? 😀

    • I’m not sure what the “Antipode 1” and “Antipode 2” are for, but the way the map works is that the red shaded land masses are where the countries actually are, and the yellow shaded land masses represent where the antipodes for those areas are located. For Australia, the antipode is in the middle of the Atlantic between North America and Africa. New Zealand is actually one of the few places on earth with an antipode that isn’t in the middle of an ocean… you could dig straight through to Spain and Portugal from places on the North Island!

  7. draliman says:

    Now you come to mention it, no, I haven’t seen a globe for years. Not since school.
    The way countries keep changing these days, globe makers would be making a fortune on “updates”!

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