Wild Things

Anyone looking to adopt a hypercarnivore?

Anyone looking to adopt a hypercarnivore?

picture dayIt’s Picture Day Wednesday, and a poorly planned out one at that what with all kinds of odds and ends fun to deal with this morning.  To make it worse, I had to completely alter the course of what I was going to write about because I realized my pictures weren’t what I thought they were….

So, out goes the script on nature’s fun little package called the hyena…

And in with a new narrative on the colorful and adorable mongrel known as the African Wild Dog!

Ummmm.... come on, dudes.  Look adorable, already...

Ummmm…. come on, dudes. Look adorable, already…

These photos come from last May’s zoo trip that has filled a number of Wednesday openings on this blog already… and I’d mistakenly assumed the dog-faced critters were your average, anything but ordinary yeens.  But Google confirmed my suspicion that they were actually the brilliantly painted wild dogs… who are in a way the hyena’s bitch.  You see, the meat-loving wild dogs kill the prey… and those laughing hyenas in the bushes wait until the time is right to march right on in and take what they think is theirs.  It’s kinda the same method your government uses to collect its taxes from your paycheck…

If the neighbors in the next exhibit over come and take this entrailed rabbit from us, we're going to shoot them.

If the neighbors in the next exhibit over come and take this gutted rabbit from us, we’re just going to lie down and let them treat us like dogs.

As with most African wildlife, the easiest place to find a wild dog is on the endangered species list.  Reading the country-by-country breakdown of the African wild dog’s past and present status is a pretty sad and discouraging tale of yet another animal that was hunted simply because it was an inconvenience to humans.  It’s a shame that the torty of the canine community might not make it around for the next century to enjoy…

I wouldn't smile so big, Sparky.  You're the next one who might end up being "inconvenient"...

I wouldn’t smile so big, Sparky. You’re the next one who might end up being “inconvenient”…

I’ll return next Wednesday with something else that’s a doggone shame…

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About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
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32 Responses to Wild Things

  1. Every time I see a hyena, I think of Whoopi Goldberg! HA HA HA! 😂

  2. ody & biskit….we thinked thoz waz hyenaz two ~~~~& yea, it izza shame that they iz endangered… 😦

    ♥♥♥

  3. Thanks for shedding light on (yet) another endangered species. I had to do some research for an endangered species challenge recently and was completely blown away at the numbers in my state alone!

  4. Cute doggies, being inconvenient a reason to kill, bad…

    • Reading their story kind of reminded me of the squirrels here. While they’re mostly protected by hunting laws, that isn’t going to stop Billy Joe Redneck from going outside and popping one if it gets on his trailer roof. Sad…

  5. Trisha says:

    Poor painted pups, another victim of humanity. If group karma is real, we’re totally fucked! One day all the wildlife will start hunting us down, one by one. I pity the people who will get taken down by those African dogs, they look scary! Hopefully, I will be killed by something cute, like a raccoon. We had a family visit last week and they were so adorable!

  6. hahahaha… the first comment is just so great…. and it is true LOL

  7. draliman says:

    Thanks for the link to hyena genitals! You learn something new you never wanted to know every day 🙂

  8. Ally Bean says:

    I want to think that these animals are cute, but they scare me. Look menacing, which might be why they’re on the endangered list. People can be so superficial…

  9. Piglove says:

    There is so many places I could go with this but I’m going to be nice… although it’s killing me. “who are in a way the hyena’s bitch” – trying to be good here – trying to be good here. Snorts and rolls with piggy laughter. XOXO – Bacon

  10. Merbear74 says:

    Sparky the Wonder Blogger! I bet he tastes like ass vomit.

  11. Gosh what can I say except I’m sorry they’re on the ever lengthening endangered list but they truly are VERY STRANGE looking and if one of them smiled at me I think I’d faint dead away – they just look SCARY and not in the least cuddly/sweet/petable. NOT!

    Pam

  12. chattykerry says:

    They are adorable – I love all sorts of wild doggies. Our street dogs in Cairo were just one step from Coyotes and they howled at night.

  13. Hyenas are even weirder than you think. Their sexuality is ambiguous and they can be both male AND female, at the same time. They are also enormously powerful, much more than their size would suggest. i don’t know why, but I spent some time reading up on hyenas one afternoon. That’s retirement for you. The sex life of hyenas. Although frankly, I’m still awestruck by the sex life of koalas. There some weird shit out there.

    • The spotted hyena is the true oddball of the animal world. The furry community, which also has a large LGBT crossover, has a field day with the spotted hyena’s sexual ambiguity and odd genitals. They’re a pretty popular species for that reason alone…

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