So, are you ready to hear The Nest play some music on a day other than Monday? Don’t worry, our Wednesday music promises to be extra shitty….. at least to me it is. Perhaps you might think differently, and that’s kinda the whole point of this new series. After all, this marks my very first entry in my Top 30 Iconic Songs That I Can’t Stand countdown! That’s a bit of a mouthful, yes, but still beats the lyrical diarrhea that plagues many of the songs I think other people like entirely too much. And just to show you that I’m not playing around with this lesson in classics desecration, I’m going to lead off my torching one of THE most iconic songs EVER! Ah, here comes DJ Scratchy and her 50 pound vinyl smashing sledgehammer now…
#30: “Imagine” – John Lennon
In December of 2004, Rolling Stone magazine published a list of its 500 Greatest Songs of All Time. Now granted, Rolling Stone is run by people who never had to live in the real world before, and who have no idea that the common people think their taste in music came straight out of the company bong…. but still, they’re pretty well accepted as rock and roll authorities. Out of every song that had ever been recorded since Elvis first shook his hips on black and white TV’s across the nation, this is what they chose as their third best song…
“Imagine” is not just an iconic song, it’s an uber iconic song. Such a crucial anthem of its time that Robert Zemeckis felt the need to work it into his “Forrest Gump is Really God” inspired alternate universe. Listening to Forrest Gump monotonely tell one of his long winded, full of shit stories while you’re patiently waiting for the goddamn bus is almost as exciting as listening to John Lennon put people to sleep while singing about his wish for world peace…
“Imagine” is nothing but straight up boring schlock disguised as an important world changing anthem. Lennon did a lot better than this during his post-Beatles days… hell, give me “Whatever Gets You Through the Night” “Instant Karma” or “Watching the Wheels” over this dreck anytime. And like every other peace song ever penned by some long haired freaky person without a real job, it ignores the fact that….. like it or not, we humans as a race have our collective faults that have remained with us throughout our history on this earth, and there’s not much anyone with a picket sign in one hand and a joint in the other can really do about it. Rather than waste time trying to change the evil side of humanity itself, how about spending more of that precious time you didn’t realize you weren’t going to have writing some better songs that are actually fun to listen to, eh John?
Now wasn’t that a whole lot of fun? I’ll return next Wednesday to blaspheme another iconic classic….
it’s maybe the most mis-used song… instant soup, tissues, tires… what can you imagine when you make an instant soup? that it is no mac&cheese?
You can imagine that it is actually soup and not just colored water….
I hated that song when it came out and still do. Everyone raved/raves about it, and I kept thinking I was missing something and that I should like it. But I don’t. I didn’t like any of his solo stuff. I liked him better back in the 60’s when he was a Beatle.
Can’t argue with that even though I like some of his solo stuff. Thank you for backing me up!
Yup, boring schlock. That song always wants me to yawn. Not sure Brian Epstein could have produced it well.
It’s dreadful! Would it have killed John to put a little life into his message?
And leave Yoko completely out of the recording studio?
Hmmm. Should I slap you from the left side or the right side?
Why not just split the difference and kick me right square in the ass?
Okay, bend over…
I am bent. Just make sure you don’t confuse my ass with my face…
Assface!!!
You know, I heard rumors that John Lennon wasn’t actually the nicest person.
That wouldn’t surprise me. Everyone has a dark side to them…
I mean he did things that were really bad, like beating women. Kinda makes the song ‘Imagine’ seem like a farce…
I was completely unaware of that side of John, and another commenter brought that up as well.
It’s not a side that’s talked about much. I hate to ruin heroes, but I’m a little more strict with John because of his peace-loving image. For what it’s worth, I’ve also heard that he became increasingly regretful of his abusive behavior in the final years of his life.
Hooray for you! I love The Beatles, I love John Lennon, and I absolutely hope I never have to suffer through the song “Imagine” ever again. It is pretentious schlock, like you said, but it is also rather ironic since its creator also gave us this little domestic abuse ditty about a decade prior: “Let this be a sermon. I mean everything I’ve said. Baby, I’m determined that I’d rather see you dead. You better run for your life if you can, Little Girl. Hide your head in the sand, Little Girl. Catch you with another man, that’s the end, Little Girl.” Lovely, isn’t it?
I was unaware John was such an asshole until you and the commenter above mentioned it. And I knew the Beatles did a song by that title, but had never heard it before since it wasn’t one of their hits. I guess Yoko always skipped over that song…
It really was quite the snoozer….instant snoresville. Don’t get me wrong though because I think Lennon wrote some great stuff but this didn’t make my list.
Pam
It might be nice for putting your enemies to sleep, but that’s about the only way it’d achieve world peace…
Being that I was a small tot when the Beatles broke up, Ringo Starr was my fave Beatle. Hey, what 5 year old didn’t love Ringo??? But as I grew older, I learned to appreciate John. So while he might not be my favourite Beatle, he is definitely my favourite post-Beatle Beatle. But this might be atop the heap of my least-fave Lennon tunes. It does make me cry when they play it during the Lennon doc where he’s playing piano and Yoko is opening up all the drapes and I don’t really hate it, it’s just kind of there…..and overplayed to hell and back.
I only like it when all the religious types carry on about it being heretical blasphemy. Then it’s my fave song EVAH!!!!1
You can totally get away with heretical blasphemy when you’re bigger than Jesus. I thought those Bible toters knew that already…
ody N biskit….itz an oh kay song; knot two terribully bad; but for sure knot one oh his best in R book
🙂 ♥♥
It’s just too slow and boring for me. I like most of his other songs…
Okay, Mr. Evil Squirrel…you’ve gone and done it now, trashed one of my favorite Beatles songs! I’m with Mer on this one. 🙂 … ahh just kidding, but I do like this song. Peace & Love ❤
It’s OK, feel free to slap away at me! I’m sure I’ll be plenty battered and bruised by the time this countdown’s over….
I will be on alert to see which song you post next time…get ready! 🙂
You think about songs. I don’t think about them much. The only time I think about them is if I’m going to play them on an instrument (rare, these days) … or because it reminds me of something else, but usually I can’t figure out what. I don’t take “peace” songs very seriously, except the ones written by Tom Lehrer. Because he made peace funny, and I’m definitely FOR funny.
I like funny songs. They’re about the only songs I actually do pay attention to the words for. My main dislike of Imagine is that it’s way too slow and boring… I was picking on the song’s meaning because that’s why so many people hold it in high esteem… and I think a bit too seriously for my taste.
Wow, you’re really inviting a beating from Mer with your choices 🙂 I see she’s already got in there.
I think this is an okay song, but I wouldn’t stick it at number three of all-time greats…
I may as well get used to the abuse since I know a number of her favorite songs appear much higher up in the countdown…
Bashing a Beatle’s song? We’re living in difficult times and Beatles fans are a rabid bunch when riled. Be careful when you venture out in public.
I will be stepping on the blue suede shoes of just about every music fan before all is said and done. I am an equal opportunity riler…
This sound was okay. Nothing to write home about. Now the song “Hey Jude”, that has more meaning to us peeps here at the Hotel Thompson. Dad sings it to mom but says “Hey June”. Inside joke with them and kills me everytime. Snorts and rolls with piggy laughter. XOXO – Bacon
I included Hey Jude in my dishonorable mentions last week… it just missed the countdown! The neverending na na na nas just make me want to smash the record!
Oh my pig!! Mom usually turns it off by then or smashes the radio. Snorts and rolls with piggy laughter. XOXO – Bacon
Yay! you put it to the Beatle lovers! I hate that song with a passion..I hate Yoko just as much! There, I’m on someones shitlist now! lol
Careful, or Merby will slap you as well! Though maybe you could slap Yoko first…
I HATE THAT SONG. It is putrid string pain to my ears and every brain cell in my body. When people coo over Imagine and tell me how much they love it I want to PUKE. THANK YOU ES for being the voice of those who have had no voice. Imagine if we never had to hear this song again. That would be nice.
I am shocked at how many people I have gotten to admit to disliking this song and/or John Lennon! And I will be just as interested to see the reactions to the other 29 songs I have chosen to disgrace (I just plotted it out, and the #1 song won’t be revealed until April 18th! This should be a nice, long, hopefully fun series….)
I actually love that song. But I’m not so sure about that disturbing image of a dumbass dictator on a magical unicorn. 😬
Thank you! I hate this song so much. Boring schlock. I think that sums it up nicely. I’m with you on the whole peace thing too. Sure, it would be nice. But human nature is too greedy, dark and twisty for it to be a reality and no amount of celebrity hypocrisy can change that. They just annoy me when they try!