Day 6: Well, That Sucks
SQUIRREL CHILD 1: Wow! What’s happening, Uncle Shadow?
SHADOW: I used my telekinetic powers to create a black hole behind Buster. He’s getting sucked into the singularity with a gravitational pull even light can not escape. He may be dead to us now, but he’ll never really die since time will crawl to a standstill from his perspective… leaving him to be painfully crushed into all of the other matter sucked inside for what he’ll consider to be an eternity. Buster, you see, has just achieved IMMORTALITY!
CHILD 1: COOL!!!!!!!!!!!
CHILD 2: I remember Gramma used to have a TV that did that when you turned it off!
CHILD 3: Yeah, sucked that black and white Spongebob down into a little single… singu…. sing hilarity.
CHILD 4: You guys were watching Gramma’s old TV? I was checking out Grampa’s Playsquirrels under the mattress!
LITTLEST: I’m telling Mommy!!!!!!!!