Share Your World – Week 8

Yes, I’m going to keep reminding you… because it’s my contest and I can do that.

Some people share their cookies, some people share their communicable diseases.  Here at Planet WordPress, we like to share our worlds.  Melanie is the chaperone of sharing, and gives us these questions that poke and probe into our private lives more than a TMZ expose.  Check it out, you know you want to.  And now, a word from our sponsor…

The people inhabiting the rear globe never get any direct sunlight…

What, in your opinion, is the point to life?

Most people seem so sure there has to be a point to life.  Why?  Is it really that big of a deal whether we’re here as part of some Grand Plan or because billions of years of genetic mutations eventually spit out our race?  I personally believe everything in the universe is random.  Fate and destiny are just excuses  we make up for why certain things happen, and even karma is the result of mere coincidence.  If there were someone out there watching over this ant farm we’re all living in, I’m pretty sure they’d have fetched the magnifying glass by now…

And I’m pretty sure I’d be the first one to get fried…

What was your most recent lie?

I really don’t know.  I’ve always considered myself to be honest to a fault… which is bad for anyone who works any kind of a job involving customer service.  You pretty much have to lie to people on a regular basis…. like, for instance, saying you’re sorry for the customer’s inconvenience when you honestly couldn’t give a shit about them.  I have always leveled with customers at work when I get asked why some product was in the location for a different price (Our evening stockers suck), or why there is nobody to unlock the fitting room or open the jewelry case after 11 PM (Our home office mandated customer service payroll doesn’t cover the last hour we’re open), or when they say they’ll just go to a different store since this one sucks (Yes, you should.  Get out of my fucking department).

I haven’t used this meme in years. Time to break it out again…

What country do you consider the strangest?

Being something of an isolationist, I don’t think I could answer this question very intelligently.  Can I consider The Shelf to be a country?  Of course I can, this is my post on my blog.  The Shelf is its own sovereign nation, and it is fucked up beyond belief.  It’s so fucked up, that even the critters who live on the Shelf experience daily culture shock…

Just another day in the life of The Shelf…

What’s your funniest story involving a car?

I guess it would have to involve my beloved 1998 Neon I drove for a tad over 17 years…

Poor thing’s probably crushed into a cube rusting somewhere now…

From the day I purchased it on November 24, 2000 until the evening it racked up its last mile on January 6, 2018… it accumulated a handful of battle scars due to certain incidents.  The cracked tail light from the time me and some old man backed into each other in 2004.  The red paint on the front drivers side where my sister sideswiped it trying to park on our street after being tailgated by an idiot.  The small dents in the front bumper from my ill fated left turn into a Norman, Oklahoma Whataburger.  But it’s first ding on my watch came…. five days after I got it.  A storm with a lot of wind hit one morning just as I was getting off work, and I got to watch from the front doors in horror as it blew a shopping cart at lickety split speed right towards my brand new ride.  It smashed into the yellow reflector on the driver’s side and broke it.

And thus one of the reasons I despise lazy idiots who refuse to take their shopping carts to the parking lot corral.

Do you have something you’re very thankful for or that showed immense kindness toward yourself or someone?

I am thankful to the rowdy, dysfunctional, incompetent staff at the Burger King I ate at on the way from bowling night to work night on Friday.  It’s hard to do your job when you feel like this…

You think the customers would notice if I just used of the plastic storage totes off the shelf?

OK, that was sarcastic.  Sarcastic gratitude is still gratitude…


About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
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21 Responses to Share Your World – Week 8

  1. have shopping carts an insurance? that’s a nuclear meltdown when THIS happens to a brandnew car… I smashed my fiat panda 5 minutes after I picked it up …I waved with the flowers they gave me& looked back and crashed into a guy with a box van… crapola ;O(

  2. Ally Bean says:

    Melanie’s questions are of a soul-searching variety. My goodness, I don’t know that I could answer any of them… except the car one. Maybe. That being said, well done evilsquirrel13.

  3. Bee Halton says:

    Lol, your take on customer service made laugh out loud. I used to work in a UK supermarket bakery department but being from Germany had slight issues with the offered bread. I love a good old sourdough with rye flour of the darkest sort but many Brits especially older ones were brainwashed to believe white yeast bread is the bee’s knees… I’ve learned a lot bread tolerance 😁 (sorry if you prefer white bread….😳)

  4. Well at least you hadn’t eaten at Burger King BEFORE you went bowling……ya know?


  5. draliman says:

    The whole world is strange. It’s the Shelf that’s normal…

  6. ghostmmnc says:

    I think you should register the Shelf as it’s on country! You could have your own flag & stamps & song & & & lots more. You already have plenty of population!
    Oh, I remembered another funny car story of mine…a friend let me drive his brand new truck, and someone ran right into the front of it (slow speed) crunching it in. I think he’d only got it that day.

    • How much would I have to pay to register the Shelf with the UN? Would it set me up for the risk of a hostile invasion? Would I have to pay taxes to my own critters? Who would I send for my Olympic curling team? So many questions….

  7. BWAHAHAHHAHA!!! Well prepare those of “World Shelf” (or would that be Country Shelf?) that they’re about to be descended upon by some mighty strange sorts from a pretty weird place all on it’s own called “Utah”. On the 28th. Watch for developments, as well as a blatant plug about C.O.W. Mine’s on the way.. Oh. Thanks for Sharing Your World this week. I needed the laugh.

    • I can’t imagine what the great state of Utah would think about Shelf Country. I definitely will look forward to your contest entry… as will all of the citizens of my new country who will have their rocks and pitchforks ready for anyone who disappoints them….

  8. I think Draliman is right. The shelf is normal. The rest of the world is wacko.

  9. Ah yes, the little country of Shelf…what I wanna know is what’s their flag look like?

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