Everybody’s humpin’ around on this fine Wednesday, the day The Nest makes it our prerogative to host that bevy of unintentional serendipity we like to call Random Image Inspiration! Lordy, lordy, RII is 40 now… at least, in terms of number of episodes, and while it isn’t getting any younger, we can always hope to at least keep the content fresh. Help us out, O mighty Randomator…
17, 28, 72, 56
The 17th post in my Reader was this one by Melanie
The 28th word in that post is “questions”
The 72nd word in that post is “born”
Putting “questions born” into Google Images brought a WTF quote meme up for the 56th result. But #57 looked something like this…
SUSAN: And so this nifty pie chart here shows how much productivity the company would gain if we piped the Dusty Vinyl Archive into the office every Monday morning. And that wraps up my debut report on the job here at Amalgamated Pushpins, Ltd. Are there any questions? Yes boss?
MR. PENCILNECK: Miss Ragsdale…
SUSAN: That’s MRS. Ragsdale, boss.
MR. PENCILNECK: Miss Ragsdale, I really want to take all of this…. um, interesting information you just gave us seriously. But I’ve been in the business long enough to know not to trust any employee who can’t dress professionally!
MS. DIVOT: I agree! This is a place of business, Miss Ragsdale, not a yoga studio!
SUSAN: Sir, do you remember how you told me to dress after I was hired?
MR. PENCILNECK: I do indeed! Like all of Amalgamated Pushpins’ loyal servants, I advised you to dress for success!
SUSAN: Yeah, and this is the outfit I won the Race For The Possums in last year! It’s both successful and suits my go-getter style well!
MS. DIVOT: Miss Ragsdale, PLEASE! Your personal life should never be discussed during working hours! In fact, a successful worker bee here shouldn’t even have a personal life. Isn’t that correct, Mr. Pencilneck, sir?
MR. PENCILNECK: Indeed, Miss Divot, indeed! Now, Miss Ragsdale, I would advise you to go home immediately and change into something that is much more uncomfortable and drab!
SUSAN: Boss, if I go home I won’t be coming back.
MS. DIVOT: I have a spare pantsuit in the janitor’s closet you may borrow if you take it to the dry cleaners once you’re done…
Susan throws her papers full of pie charts and bar graphs on the table and walks out.
MR. PENCILNECK: (Readjusting his tie) Hmph! Millennials!
MS. DIVOT: (Smoothing over a run in her stockings) Such a disrespectful lot! Not a shred of professionalism!
MR. PENCILNECK: Embarrassing the company in front of our CEO even! (Turns to the company’s big boss in the sharp suit sitting next to him) Sir, I’m so sorry you had to witness this travesty! Believe me, sir, I’ll find someone who will truly represent the kind of professional work ethic Amalgamated Pushpins stands for!
The CEO reclines back in his office chair and props his feet up on the table….. clad in a pair of faded, beat up Converse Chuck Taylors.
CEO: You already have, Pencilneck! I think I found the perfect person to replace that stuffy underling and his musty secretary I’ve been dying to rid this workplace of…
Those pants are awful…
I’m far from a fashion expert, but I can’t even guess what kind of pants they are. They look like they were worn by a painter, though…
I was thinking some kind of urban camo, perhaps designed by someone who suffered extreme debilitating eye injury.
Egad…just because you can, doesn’t mean you should make certain clothes. Camo prints at the top of that list!
Especially since you can’t see camo print. It’s like you’re wearing no pants at all…
I bet the replacement is either (a) his niece Iwanka Pencilneck or (b) his secretary Miss Sally Soreknees……..When do we get part 2 of this Randomness???
LOL, Sally Soreknees! I think that may have been one of Mitzi’s roles in a movie of a certain three letter rating!
Yeah, take that Miss Divot. I disliked her from the moment she opened her mouth. I’m pretty gutted Miss Ragsdale turned out to be a “Mrs”…
Alas, Mrs. Ragsdale was too much of a catch for someone. But she definitely wears the pants in the family, hideous as they are….
I’m honored that I rose to the top of the randomness this week! :* Thanks. Um, now where did you say that bonus check was going to be sent? 😛 Camo pants cost a LOT of money you know. Because there’s no accounting for taste, and some folks never know what to wear, which is why (I suppose) ‘the man’ invented uniforms. So much easier to dress with individuality taken out of the equation. Still. I concur with the general consensus that the outfit is f-ugly. What is it with the color gray and millennials? They pair gray with EVERYTHING and sometimes that’s a crime against the sighted.
Grey is the new black, or something like that. But thanks for the “words” of wisdom! One of these days I’m going to catch something really risque and…. well hell, I write enough stuff that’s like that already!
that’s no good outfit… but it fits to a possum race… it could look nice, when she ends like da possum… red& gray…yay!