Shelf Critter Advent Calendar – Day 7

Like me, I’ll bet you can’t wait to wake up each morning to see what’s behind the next door in The Nest’s holiday surprise showcase, the Shelf Critter Advent Calendar!  Actually, that wouldn’t be like me since I work nights.  But regardless (or irregardless, if you enjoy using ticking off grammar nazis), it’s time to see if there’s heaven on the seventh door, or if it will instead be a day that will live in infamy….

Hey, it’s The Nest’s original fucked up mess, Sparklepony!

SPARKLEPONY: Excuse me!?!?

Nothing personal, of course.  Just commenting on your trashy look.  So, what does Christmas mean to a high class gal like you?

SPARKLEPONY: Christmas means getting showered in all kinds of expensive and lavish gifts from those who truly love me!  Cucci purses.  Designer high heels…

Ummmm, Debbie Gibson cologne?  A couch pillow?  A bar of soap!?!?  And is the gaudy bauble on that ring even real?  I don’t see anything expensive and lavish there…

SPARKLEPONY: Of course you don’t, because I live around a bunch of ungrateful and cheap bastards who do their Christmas shopping in the last minute gift aisle!  My own spawn bought me most of this garbage!

Do you even give the Sponkies an allowance?

SPARKLEPONY: That’s besides the point!  Haven’t they heard of credit cards?  And that hunk of glass came from my dear, beloved hubby… who will be sleeping with the possums behind the shed all winter to pay for this mistake!  And to think I bought them all fancy $5 White Castle gift cards…

Ummmm…. isn’t it supposed to be the thought that counts?

SPARKLEPONY: What are you talking about?  These are some of the most thoughtless gifts I’ve ever gotten!

About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
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14 Responses to Shelf Critter Advent Calendar – Day 7

  1. Well she’s got a point there……those gifts are perhaps the most “un-lavish” (go ahead grammar nazis) I’ve seen in a long time. Says a lot about her hubby and spawn.

    Pam

  2. ghostmmnc says:

    I think I’m psychic – before I looked at this post, I just knew it would be Sparklepony – Yay! my favorite one. 🙂

  3. I’m with Sparklepony, she needs to return these gifts, lol.

  4. Hey, nfor the record…there’s nothing trashy about a few glittery sparkles.

  5. She is in bad condition,vwhat has happened? Gifts are for children, maybe.

  6. draliman says:

    It’s like those Sponkies don’t even care or something…

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