Since I like to share irreverent information from the past week in the intros to these posts, The Nest would like to take a moment to note the passing of former FBI director William S. Sessions this past Friday at the age of 90. Other than J. Edgar Hoover, who I only know thanks to one of the funniest movies of all time, “Clue,” Sessions is the only other Top G-Man I could pick out of a lineup… and above you see why. He took the government’s crusade against drugs and put them where every kid from my generation would see them… on almost every arcade game released in the early 90’s, making him a known name among a demographic who knew the names of more Mortal Kombat fighters than US Congressmen. The Nest will break some off of Fuzzywig’s stash and light one up in Mr. Sessions’ honor… since after all, there are no winners on this blog.
And now, it’s Share Your World time! Let’s see what Melanie has in store for us this week…
What do you think of professional motivational speakers? Do you think they motivate?
What a bunch of con men. What do people see in these slick talking shysters anyway? Pollyanna and Prozac will only get you so far in life. I mean….. hold on, I can’t concentrate.
What’s all that noise over there!?!?
MR. FOX: ……………………….
Thunderous applause rages from the crowd…
Seriously, what are you stupid critters doing anyway?
TROLL: Shhhhhh!!! Would you keep it down? We’re trying to listen to this motivational speech! It’s making me into a better burger flipper!
Are you nuts, Troll? That fox can’t….
FUZZYWIG: Dude! You’re cramping my motivational mellow here! This guy’s got me more hyped up than Snuggle’s crystal meth…
Seriously? Come on, Rainy. Surely you can’t be buying this crap…
RAINY: Zip it, or I’ll spray you while you sleep! This speech has helped me see the light and learn to embrace the sunshine in life!
That’s ridiculous….. Shadow!?!? You too!?!?
SHADOW: I may be the most advanced and intelligent creature within this galaxy, but the words of this vulpine have left me brimming with a zeal to appreciate all critters great and small!
MITZI: Mitzi, like, totally can’t apprehend all these big words…. but Mitzi’s totally getting moisturized by this foxy woxy’s speechie!
YOU’RE ALL CRAZY!!!! YOU’VE ALL FALLEN UNDER THE TRANCE OF THIS CRACKPOT!
MR. FOX: …………………………………..
See! He doesn’t even say anything! He just stares at you with those googly eyes, and…..
MR. FOX: ……………………………………..
I think motivational speakers provide an excellent service to the public, as we all need the guidance of those who know so much more about life than we do. I’m feeling really good about myself right now, and this is going to be the best Share Your World question and answer session ever! Thank you for changing my life, Mr. Fox!
Do you have a favorite flavor?
Flavors aren’t really universal. I might like chocolate candy, but I wouldn’t touch a chocolate drink. I love cherry flavored candy, but keep that shit out of my soda!
While out walking, you hear a rustling in some bushes. What do you think of?
What’s your ideal temperature (nature-wise)? Hot, cold, temperate and mild, humid or bone dry?
We get enough hot and humid during the summer, and I’ll pass on both. I prefer mild, but will take cool weather over warm since I’m one with my hoodie from September through May. And if it has to be hot, I want it arid like the desert so I can go an entire summer without cutting the grass like I did in 2012…
Attitude of Gratitude
Since I mentioned my flea problem in the past two SYW posts, I should provide an update that things have improved a lot. I blamed the expensive flea control pills for not doing their job… but that’s because I was only checking Biskit rather than the reclusive Ody. When I discovered Saturday morning that Ody was relatively flea free while Biskit still looked like a reject from a Sally Struthers starving kids commercial… it became very obvious that the little asshole spit out his pill Tuesday after I’d thought he swallowed it. So after ramrodding another pill down his throat, his condition has improved as well. And now that both cats are effectively flea terminators, hopefully the bastards that are still hatching every day in the house will eventually disappear too. I look forward to no longer being nibbled on…