The X Files

Not a prize one of the winners can claim…

The moment we’ve all been waiting for is finally here!  It’s time to announce the winners of the 2021 Contest of Whatever!  X is about to become the favorite letter of the alphabet for at least two people in this world…

Make that three…

It was a grind…. maybe even moreso than the infamous 2018 contest that involved the picture of the man and the pig in the bathtub.  But in the end, eight of you were able to find inspiration in the 24th letter of our alphabet and submit an entry in this year’s contest.  That makes this eight out of eight years that the number of official CoW entries has been either eight, nine or eleven.  The Contest is nothing if not consistent…

Just in case you needed to be reminded of this…

For the second straight year, there were no rookie entries in the Contest.  That makes the lack of new blood taking a stab at the contest a very real trend, unfortunately.  But that’s just the way it is apparently.  We shall carry on for as long as at least eight of you who’ve been around for a while are willing to go forth and create in the name of FUN!

And you don’t need to spend thousands of dollars to have this much fun in the CoW!

And now for the spiel I give every year…. picking a winner was no easy task.  The entries were all wonderful and creative in their own ways.  There’s rarely a year where I come into this day being able to pick just one entry as the best with a clear conscience.  But I’m not Scrooge McDuck, I work at Mecca…. so I can only give two prizes.  And it’s time to announce the winner of that first prize!

Here it is!!!! The winner of The Eighth Annual Contest of Whatever is……………

drum roll

Drum roll please, Hottie…


Time to break open the celebratory bubbly!

Since I’m just a year younger than Merby, her poetic ode to Generation X obviously spoke to me…. as I often pine for the simpler times of my 80’s youth.  It was a great time to grow up!  This was one of three entries I was giving serious consideration to going into this weekend (No, I won’t say what the other two were!)… and what put it over the top for me was that it was my favorite interpretation of this year’s X theme.  A number of you seemed to struggle with X, which I found odd since, while brainstorming themes earlier in the year, I chose X after I realized how many unique ways it could be spun off into a theme!  And Generation X wasn’t even one of the ideas I thought of myself, so props to Merby and her Brain Cooties for coming up with it and claiming her very first overall CoW prize after many years of playing!

And hopefully it’ll keep me from getting the shit slapped out of me in the future!

OK, the rest of you can stop throwing rotten food on stage for a moment.  There’s still the random prize to award to one of the remaining runners up!  As usual, we’re going to use the order I drew the entries in for Friday’s post as the basis for this drawing…

  1. Merby
  2. ghostmmnc
  3. Draliman
  4. Jenn
  5. Pam
  6. Phenny
  7. Trisha
  8. Melanie

And I’ll once again reach for the same deck of blind man’s cards I’ve used to pick the random winner in each of the previous seven CoW’s.  I’ll just remove the ace for Merby, leaving me with one card for each of the remaining players…

Mitzi will once again get the honors of choosing this year’s random winner…

MITZI: Like, peeeeewwwwwsies!  Something totally, like smells skunky!  Mitzi swears she totally douched this morning!

That’s probably coming from Fuzzywig, who was chosen as the overseer for this year’s drawing.  He’s going to make sure the drawing is completely honest and fair.

MITZI: Mitzi wouldn’t want it any other way!  Unless, like, someone wanted to bribe Mitzi with some smoochies!

Now that everyone knows you can’t be trusted, let’s get this drawing started before the FCC raids The Nest.  I shuffled the cards until I was absolutely sure I had no idea where any card could possibly be in the deck and placed them back on the table.  Alright Mitzi, do your stuff….. and no, not the kind of stuff you do at the gentleman’s club…

MITZI: You’re, like, totally no fun!

And the winner of the random drawing is……………….

MITZI: OMG!  It’s, like, 69!!!

Fuzzy, did you notice anything unusual about this drawing?

FUZZYWIG:……….. Huh?  Was I supposed to be watching something?

Oh for crying out loud……

Congratulations to PHENNY and NELLY!!!!

Pee mail for the win!

I believe the staff over at Easy Blog only entered on a lark due to my incessant reminders over the last week of the contest…. but look what it got them!  Their very first contest prize!  And now I get to see if Cafepress can send things to France or not.  Congratulations to the boys and their parents!

Merby and Phenny now both get to choose any item valued at $20 USD or less from my Cafepress Shop to have delivered to their door… however long that may take in today’s environment.  Please send your address info and your chosen prize to my email which can be found in the Contact page

Sorry, live unicorns may not be shipped through the mail.

And of course, there’s that Contest of Whatever tradition….. the silly badges that nobody would be caught dead displaying on their blogs!  Whether you were a winner…

Or a loser….

If you played this year, you get an indelible souvenir of your effort!

Thanks to everyone who played this year’s Contest of Whatever!  I look forward to hosting this again next year with brand new theme that will leave you banging your heads against the wall.  See you next February for the Ninth Annual Contest of Whatever!


About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
This entry was posted in Squirrel Droppings and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to The X Files

  1. Congrats to the winners, I know it’s hard to pick um koff koff pick a winner..or two! Now a wee correction for your day. I ALWAYS display my ‘badge’ (winner or not), even though last year I had to alter it a bit because that leprechaun you used was giving Ziggy nightmares! 😉 I’ll proudly hoist Snuggle aloft as a tribute this year! Cheers Squirrel!

  2. Sorry. I always mean to enter but honestly, I have yet to think of anything even remotely original. I just stare at it and my brain doesn’t grind into gear. It’s not for lack of trying. Sorry!!!

    • I don’t try to pressure anyone, just encourage them to play… and at least you’ve played before! Some of my peeps never even try, and I wonder why they don’t ever want to get in on the fun….

  3. draliman says:

    Yay, well done Mer! I enjoyed your poem, I am also of Gen X 🙂
    I totally lost again! I’m seeing a pattern… 😮

  4. Well done Merby and a hearty congrats to my two favorite Weims as well. Excellent batch of entries this year. The minute I hit “SEND” after crafting my entry I thought of a whole pile of other lines for that poem….typical of me. Blame it on my age! Thanks for hosting such a fun contest every year. Seriously.


  5. Congrats to the winners. A great job by a great batch of contestants, one and all.
    The Ranch Hands

  6. Kismet says:

    I’m a winner because I didn’t play.

  7. Mer O'Leary says:

    What? Did I win the contest? Really? Holy shit. 😀
    Wow, thanks ES! Woohoo!!

    • Yes you did! And with the very first entry, which is unusual given how often I change my mind. I loved it from the beginning, and while some of the other entries were as good, none were better…

      • Mer O'Leary says:

        Aw, thanks!! A much-needed bright spot in my life right now.
        I just emailed you and I put my “I’m a Winner” CoW badge on Brain Cooties. It was in desperate need of some bling. 🙂
        You’ll always be allowed to address me as Merby, by the way. I mean, not like I could fucking stop you anyway…

  8. ooooh concats mer!!!!! and concats to us!!! we guessed it that Mitzi loves real boys… bet she marked the card hahahahahahaha

  9. Pingback: MISCHIEF MO(A)NDAY | Easy Blog

  10. Mr Evil! We (finally) found you! Yes, our human is woefully inept at clicking the touchpad and ends up in remote locations not remotely related to where we actually want to go. But I, Marvelous, have persevered and FOUND your lair! I send you fair warning that YOU can now expect us to visit and leave lame comments. Have a marvellously happy day!

  11. ghostmmnc says:

    So much fun whether we’re a winner or not.
    Congratulations, Mer! I loved your entry! 🙂

  12. Trisha says:

    A belated contratulations to the winners! As a prize I highly recommend the Rainbow Donkey Believe mug. I swear it’s magical and coffee tastes better out of it than any other mug!

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