Share Your World – Week 144

Actually, she’s about as frightening as most three year olds…

This week’s featured Share Your World shelf critter is the adorably terrifying little hellion Zeeba.  Zeeba was one half of a two pack of Hatchimals eggs I bought at Mecca in November 2017, which I worked into SCT at the time as being surprisingly laid by Mitzi.  For two months, nobody, including myself, knew what was in the contents of those little pastel purple eggs… and who knew a psychotic little zebra was going to emerge from one of them?

And at that moment, The Shelf would never be able to sleep at night…

It still took almost a year for Zeeba’s personality to morph from an adorable little foul-mouthed goofball into the bloodthirsty killer she’s now world famous for being (which you can blame Bambi for).  If you hear a little girl’s cries of “Blood! Blood! Blood!”….. you better run for the fucking hills!

Stupid fat possums can’t run for the hills…

A Share Your World question themed around Zeeba….

Are you one of those people who get queasy at sight of blood, or could you watch an open heart surgery?

Don’t you hate having to clean up after little kids?

Now, let’s share our world with Melanie’s wonderful questions for this week!

Per Zeeba’s request. Hey, you gonna tell her no?

How do you feel about sharing your computer or phone password with your partner?

Fortunately for me, I have no partner to worry about keeping passwords from….

SHADOW: Heh, heh, heh!  Foolish squirrel.  He thinks I can’t see him type in his password from way back on the Shelf.  My vision is as superior as my intellect, and what ES doesn’t know is that I’m using his computer to store my plans for world domination!  Let’s see….. password “iluvmitzi69″….

SHADOW: Bingo!  I’m in!  And now to enact my dastardly scheme to become the supreme ruler of this pitiful planet!  My top secret plans should be in this folder…..

Click!

SHADOW: What kind of tomfoolery is this!?!?  Why has my takeover strategy been replaced by hideous videos of feline chicanery!?!?

TINA: Squeeeeeeee!!!!  Aren’t they just so totes adorbs, Uncle Shadow?

SHADOW: I am not amused by your juvenile display of vivacious affection for these oversized furballs.  What happened to my plans for….

TINA: You big dork!  You think you’re the only one who knows Uncle Evil’s password?  When I found all these super cute cat videos, I just had to save them so I could watch them over and over and over again!  And I figured nobody needed that folder that said “World Domination,” so I just….

SHADOW: YOU ERASED THE PLANS I’VE SPENT YEARS WORKING ON!?!?!?  Turnabout is fair play, little rapscallion, and these disgusting cat videos are about to enter the Recycling Bin…

TINA: (Nuzzling Shadow) Awwwwww… you wouldn’t break a little cutie’s heart like mine erasing those awesome kitteh videos, would you big boy?

SHADOW: Please cease and desist from this scandalous behavior!  You’re giving me a very strange sensation inside my Pokeballs…..

TINA: OMG!  You’re such a big prevert, Uncle Shadow!

TINA: Help!  Big Scrat!  This mean old preverted Dumbreon is getting excited over my tiny jailbait body!

SHADOW: NO!  I’m not……… OK, you win!  Sigh….. the cat videos can stay!

TINA: YAY!  I knew you were the cool uncle!  Awwwwwwwww!!!!

SHADOW: Curse you ignorant felines for meddling in my nefarious scheme!

What is the greatest struggle you’ve overcome?

Beating out thousands and thousands of my fellow sperm cells to get to the egg first.  I’ll bet none of them would have taken squirrel pictures or staged funny SCT skits for your amusement…

It may be the only time in my life I ever won a race…

If heaven is real and you died tomorrow, do you think you would get in?  Why or why not?

If I’m subjected to the judgment of other people, including those who may or may not the Holy, I’m completely fucked because I don’t conform to anyone’s standard of conduct…

Looks like I won’t be getting an answer anytime soon…

What makes you feel like you really need to be alone?

People.  They are annoying.  People on the internet are slightly less annoying, but only because I can easily get away from them with a simple mouse click…

Little People aren’t annoying because they’re can be choking hazards for annoying people.

Do you have any traditions around this time of year? 

Yes….

And there is always my SYW closing tradition….

About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
This entry was posted in Share Your World and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

21 Responses to Share Your World – Week 144

  1. Good thing you were the fastest swimmer and reached the egg first – or else we’d have no flashback ‘toons like this one! Nice that Zeeba got to enjoy her time in the blood-soaked spotlight as this week’s creature feature.

    Pam

  2. to live with buster is the best therapy for seeing blood as a normal thing ;O)))

  3. Thank you Bill (aka Evil Squirrel) for Sharing Your Amazing World. Even though the violence-0-meter was off the charts…hmm. Maybe the thing is broken, because surely it could not be YOU! Not with cute kitteh videos and that hilarious ending comic strip. You belong in the ‘pun’ hall of fame, right next to that husky spouting them (like: I tried to catch fog yesterday. Straight-dog Husky “Oh pls NO!” Pun-husky: I MIST.” ) bwahahah. Okay you had to be there.😲 Great answers to all the questions and I’ve duly noted Zeeba’s question for the Halloween edition of SYW (whenever that is..in a few weeks). Woo hoo! 🎃 🦇 🧟🏻‍♂️🧟🏻‍♀️ I agree most heartily with your “people” answer and odd thing about that one is that I had a set of those very ‘little people’ when I was a kid. I guess the name would be too PC incorrect these days…🤔 Have a great week!

    • I think they’re still called “Little People,” but the figures are like Duplo blocks compared to Legos. Dammit, give kids back their toys that were dangerous and weeded out the stupid ones!

  4. mydangblog says:

    I wish Zeeba could meet my Zebrasus (it’s a cross between a zebra and a Pegasus, and it wears Mardi Gras beads and smokes a cigar). Ken and I definitely share passwords, although he can never remember mine:-)

  5. I don’t know about anyone else, but 3 year old scare the BeJesus outa me. Their energy is terrifying as are their online skills.

  6. Trisha says:

    I kinda wish Tina hadn’t foiled Shadow’s plans of world domination. He probably would do a better job of running the place than the evil bastards that are currently pulling the strings!

    • I think about any of my Shelf Critters would be an improvement over the people actually in charge. Even Zeeba! Though I’d prefer a Mr. Fox type of leader…

      • Trisha says:

        Mr. Fox as leader with Zeeba as his enforcer, now that would be a terrifying, yet effective, administration. No one would dare step out of line or even open their mouth to suggest a stupid idea!

  7. draliman says:

    Yay, Zeeba in the spotlight!
    There’s nothing like people to make you want to get away from people…

  8. Mer O'Leary says:

    Rapscallion is my new favorite word, thank you Shadow!

Jabber Away...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s