You won’t be able to SIT in time out once we’re done with you, young man!
In the United States, when an 18 year old runs amok and tears shit up, we slap them on the wrist and maybe make them pick up some litter off the side of the road. In Singapore, they beat your ass for that. And so it was that on May 5, 1994, eighteen year old American citizen Michael Fay got four strokes from the government cane for numerous acts of vandalism he committed in the foreign land the prior September. While some were horrified that another country doesn’t mess around with juvenile delinquents and their delicate sensibilities, I continue to be amazed that with our prison overcrowding and massive recidivism rates that we haven’t adopted such a swift and effective solution to criminal behavior here. You can use ass beatings as punishment for a wide variety of crimes from drug trafficking to shoplifting to thinking it’s perfectly fine to drive 80 mph on the highway as long as you’re in a legitimate hurry. To paraphrase another common saying: spare the rod, spoil the adult…
OK, I guess it wouldn’t work as a deterrent to masochists.
Since you can see what a model citizen all of those smacks from the “board of education” turned me into, let’s put our lessons from the school of hard knocks to use and answer Melanie’s Share Your World questions for this week, all of which come from fellow SYW players…
Come on, you can’t punish someone with an olive branch!
What constitutes a sandwich in your opinion?
Something that’s completely unappetizing because it got trapped between two slices of uncooked bread…
Because people who actually get lemons are lucky.
Are ‘strong’ and ‘tough’ in regard to character the same thing or different?
Maybe I’ve played too many turn based combat games in my life, but “strong” to me represents a person’s offensive capabilities while “tough” indicates their defensive abilities. A strong person will beat the world down, while a tough person can take what the world dishes out. Someone who is both strong and tough can be invincible…
And is probably using a cheat mod on life…
What’s your opinion on RSVPs?
Well, to have an opinion on RSVP’s, the first thing I have to do is figure out exactly what the hell an RSVP is. That bizarre acronym has perplexed me since the first time I saw it on a birthday party invitation when I was in first grade…
RSVP stands for the French phrase “répondez s’il vous plaît” meaning “please reply.” Wouldn’t it be just a bit simpler to just say those two small words rather than pick four seemingly random letters that nobody who doesn’t speak French will understand? Before there were confusing internet acronyms that nobody could decipher, there was RSVP to confound the masses…
It’s fun to stay at the R S V P!
So now to answer the question….. fuck them! Nobody should feel obligated to respond to a damned unsolicited invitation. Most people should already know what the answer’s going to be from me….
How can I make “FUCK NO!” look all fancy on this fine parchment?
Do you think Hell has walls?
Gotta have some place to chain sinners up while they’re being sporked for all eternity.
What would you name your boat if you had one?
What will finally break the internet?
If you had to change your name, what would your new name be, and why would you choose that name?
What are some things that sound like compliments but are actually insults?
If you could know the absolute and total truth to one question, what question would you ask?
Geez Louise, this should have been saved for its own edition of Share Your World!
The Admiral’s Flagship (Another Three Stooges reference)
Termites
Evil N. Squirrel, the N stands for Nuts.
“Interesting post!”
Why do possums have a bifurcated penis?
Don’t look at me, I don’t share our trade secrets!
How many bloggers are trying to balance the likelihood that WordPress will hike prices against the near certainty that their computers are ready to roll over and die?
Ummmm… does this involve math?
And just who pays WordPress for their “services” anyway? I don’t pay the Crappiness Engineers for anything but domain registration…
There’s better ways to waste your money…
What’s the most impressive, or oddest thing you’ve ever fixed with duct tape
I’ve used duct tape to reupholster cat clawed furniture…
Hey, I paid a whole $0 for that chair anyway.
Gratuitous SYW ending comic:
Evil Squirrel's Nest 
Yep – RSVP had me wondering too and I never had a party or event classy enough to use RSVP for except my wedding reception. I pay ZIP for my WordPress blog because I don’t have a domain….I’m not entirely sure what having a domain would get me. Had my own website years ago when I was writing books though. FREE is good enough for MEEEE. About duct tape – I think the world is being held together by it. Seriously.
Pam
By having my own domain, now if someone else comes along and tries to set up an “Evil Squirrel’s Nest,” well, they’re crap out of luck! I don’t know who’d want to do that, though. Maybe someone who wants to sell duct tape to fix broken squirrel nests…
OR someone who likes pole-dancing unicorns?
sure da hell has walls… and it is wall-entines day there every day ;O)… and now we sing the rvsp song… thanks LOL
The hand motions are going to be fun for RSVP!
I grew up in an era when RSVP were de rigeur! Very interesting post, and I agree with you on the strokes of a cane. But then, there’s be a law suit!
That’s when we turn the cane on the lawyers!
Any phrase preceded by “interesting” is suspect. Period.
Unless you’re Arte Johnson…
Thank you E.N.S. for Sharing Your World! Yes, I already copped to the fact that I put “too many questions’ up this week and should (there I go ‘shoulding’ on myself. Without the bread) have split them in two. Blame it on a whole sandwich ton of stress this past couple of weeks! My favorite type of doughnut, prior to reading this post, was the raised chocolate covered. Now I may never be able to eat one ever again. 😝😜 I hope that saran wrap didn’t leak… 😉 It took me many seconds but finally I “got’ the joke in your toon o’ the week ( 🤣 ) I wish more people lived by that little used ‘golden rule” too! 😆🤣 We don’t have possums in Utah, but that whole er, anatomical anomaly you’ve mentioned a few times has me pondering if the lady possum has two portals too. Or I can think of another use for that extra peeny weeny, but I ain’t going there. I know this isn’t a family blog per se, but some thing ought to remain secret, especially if they involve sketchy sexual practices one may or may not have had after consuming fourteen margaritas. 🤐 Feliz Cinco De Mayo. I bet Mecca will have a run (no pun intended) on jalapeno bites and faux Mexican food (ala gringo). Have a great week too!!
I’m sure that donut is really chocolate unless it was bought from a really sketchy bakery. I’ve never bothered to check out the “socket” that possum adapter is supposed to go in…. so either possie ladies are special or maybe they’re big fans of, err….. DP.
There’s at least 3 SYWs in there! I did notice there were a lot of questions this week.
Sandwich – “trapped between two slices of uncooked bread”. By “uncooked bread”, do you mean “dough”? If so, you’re doing it wrong…
Well, I consider bread to be uncooked if it isn’t toasted at least three shades of black and a smoke alarm isn’t going off somewhere…
I’ve been to Singapore. It’s one of the most pleasant places on Earth. If that’s what corporal punishment produces, I say let’s have it here…