SCT Secret Santa – Day 19

If you feel like you’ve got that holiday spirit flowing through your body right now, then we have just the cure that will have you feeling like a Scrooge all over again.  It’s the Shelf Critter Secret Santa exchange, guaranteed to bring out the bah humbug in even the most selfless of souls…

Uh oh, hide the children.  This episode will be rated R for violence…

BEARCAT: We’re children, silly!  And we’re not going anywhere!

ZEEBA: Damn right!  Zeeba Claus is ready to make someone’s holiday merry and bright!  With BLOOD!!!!  Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood! Blood!…..

Yeah, whatever Krampus.  Pick an unlucky name while we fetch Troll to clean up the forensic evidence…

Looks like someone’s lord and savior has forsaken them again….

ZEEBA: Merry Christmas, Asshole!!!

RICKY: Begone, Satan!

BEARCAT: Don’t you like your gift, mister?  It’s a sacrificial lamb!

MARY: A bloody Mary, get it?

RICKY: I get it all too well, I’m afraid.  My child, I hope these two junior heathens haven’t hurt you.

MARY: Of course not! I figured if Mitzi could come out on stage covered in Vegemite, I could show off how sexy I look covered in ketchup!

BEARCAT: Yeah, see!  It’s just like in the scary movies, we doused Miss Mary with ketchup!

MARY: Wanna lick me clean, choir boy?

RICKY: I’ll pass, thank you.  But might I ask why, if that ketchup was used to cover this poor, misguided lamb, is the packet not opened?

BEARCAT: (Looks confused) That’s a good question!  Sis, how did you…..?

ZEEBA: You dumbasses!!!!  Zeeba never uses ketchup!!!!!!

ZEEBA: Zeeba always uses real BLOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MARY: OK, I’m not sure if I should feel turned on or completely grossed out by this revelation….

RICKY: Speaking of Revelations…… Lord, please don’t forget your devoted disciple during the imminent rapture!

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About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
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10 Responses to SCT Secret Santa – Day 19

  1. Well what’s Christmas without a little Christmas Carnage after all……That possum is an endless source!

    Pam

  2. Twindaddy says:

    Maybe it’s Frank’s Red Hot. I put that shit on everything.

  3. Any chance Zeeba will outgrow this obsession?

  4. draliman says:

    No lambs were harmed during the making of this episode! Just a possum. And he was expecting it…

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