Category Archives: Advent Calendars

The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 8

On the eighth day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Eight males a’milking! SNUGGLE: Dafuq, dude!?!?  The only reason I volunteered to help on your farm was so I could squeeze the udders! JIM BOB: Sorry, I’ve got the … Continue reading

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The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 7

On the seventh day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Seven swines a’sizzlin’! CLETUS: Say thar, pardner… I reckon you ain’t seen a little lost piggy around these parts that escaped from my farm? HUNG LO: Sorry, Hung Lo … Continue reading

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The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 6

On the sixth day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Six bears a laying! BROTHER BEAR: So, shouldn’t there be five other bears laying down with me? MITZI: Ooooh, how kinky!  Like, we can totally make five more bears!  … Continue reading

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The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 5

On the fifth day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Five golden kids! SQUIRREL DAD: Aw, aren’t our children so sweet? SQUIRREL MOM: It’s all an act!  I know they’ve been up to no good. SQUIRREL DAD: Don’t you … Continue reading

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The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 4

On the fourth day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Four calling frauds! TROLL: …yes and my routing number is 8675309.  Yeah, just like the song! BUB: Did you just give out your checking account information over the phone? … Continue reading

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