Tag Archives: mitzi

The Judges Speak

MITZI: Like, it must be time to totally be Judge Judy again! SNUGGLE: Wait a minute!  Where’s the Coke bottle with the pubic hair on it!?!?  Where’s my bottle of hooch!?!?  This looks like some fruity shit Big Scrat would … Continue reading

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Calendar Of Critters

SQUIRREL CHILDREN: Uncle Hung!  Uncle Hung!!!! HUNG LO: Sorry, Hung Lo’s buffet not offer kid’s menu.  Maybe kids ON menu… SQUIRREL CHILD 1: We’re BORED!!! CHILD 2: Tell us a Chinese story Uncle Hung! CHILD 3; Yeah!  About dragons and … Continue reading

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It’s A Wonderful Shelf

It’s Christmas Eve.  Evil Squirrel, President and CEO of Shelf Critter Theatre, LLC, looks over a bridge and ponders his misfortune… EVIL SQUIRREL: Ten years now I’ve been trying to make a name for myself.  I drew comics.  I made … Continue reading

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The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 15

On the fifteenth day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Fifteen feet of….. garland! MITZI: Like, Mitzi totally doesn’t remember putting that funky garland on the tree! ZEEBA: It’s intestines!!!! BEARCAT: Yeah, we dissected a possum in school today, … Continue reading

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The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 8

On the eighth day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Eight males a’milking! SNUGGLE: Dafuq, dude!?!?  The only reason I volunteered to help on your farm was so I could squeeze the udders! JIM BOB: Sorry, I’ve got the … Continue reading

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