Tag Archives: seymour

The 24 Days Of Shelfmas – Day 3

Posted on December 3, 2021 by evilsquirrel13

On the third day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me… Three French…. words. SANTA: Just three!?!? George Carlin said there were seven of them, and that ain’t even close to enough profanity to get me through this fucking holiday! … Continue reading →

Posted in Advent Calendars | Tagged advent, calendar, christmas, days, elf, french, reindeer, santa, seymour | 16 Comments

Even Badder Santa

Posted on December 1, 2017 by evilsquirrel13

The little critters lined up at the local Mecca to tell Santa what their greedy asses want for Christmas are beginning to grow restless as the jolly old elf is now a good half hour late for his scheduled meet … Continue reading →

Posted in Shelf Critter Theatre | Tagged christmas, critter, elf, fucked up, funny, fuzzywig, humor, i was all kinds of mean and nasty today, lamb, mary, mitzi, santa, santa claus, security, seymour, shelf, squirrels, theater, tina, troll | 12 Comments

Bad Santa

Posted on November 18, 2016 by evilsquirrel13

SANTA: HO HO HO!!! Merry Christm….. oh, fuck it! I hate this time of year. Lousy kids wanting to sit on my lap and ask for crappy toys made in China that they’ll lose, break or forget about by New … Continue reading →

Posted in Shelf Critter Theatre | Tagged bimbocorn, children, critter, critters, dog, elf, figurines, funny, fuzzywig, humor, kids, mitzi, play, raccoon, santa, santa claus, scratchy, seymour, shelf, skunk, sparklepony, sponkies, squirrel, stuffies, theater, tina, toys, unicorn | 31 Comments

The Great Debate

Posted on October 12, 2016 by evilsquirrel13

CHIP: Good evening, everyone out there in TV land! This is Chip Squirrel live on the scene of the 69th Presidential debate of this tightly contested 2016 campaign between the incumbent Uncle Sam and the upstart challenger Bashful. In the … Continue reading →