After reading about my unfortunate incident that happened this past Tuesday right in my own backyard, a couple of my readers commented that it would have been awesome had my squirrels rose up and beat back the scumbags who decided my air conditioner was more valuable as scrap copper than as a machine to ensure me and my cats don’t roast to death. After all, this theft literally occurred right under the tree that serves as the base for their sciurine operations I quite often capture for your enjoyment on my blog.
Well, over the past couple days, I’ve noticed that one squirrel outside my window does seem to be taking this advice to heart, and has been preparing himself to defend the backyard from any other neighborhood terrorists that try to take advantage of me.
I have watched in amazement as this squirrel has put himself through intense backyard basic training that would even make Gunnery Sergeant Hartman bust his perfectly polished buttons with pride.
This versatile solider squirrel can turn any weapon into a lethal killing machine.
In case of a blitzkrieg, this lean, mean, fuzzy machine isn’t afraid to break out the big guns if necessary…
This bushy tailed warrior will fight to the death to protect his turf. He can take a licking, and keep on ticking!
But make no mistake… a little shrapnel under the fur only serves to make G.I. Squirrel really angry. You don’t want any piece of this squirrel when he’s angry.
There’s no letting up for this squirrel, even when his weapons have been exhausted. He’s also an expert in paw to hand combat…
He can take to the trees and fight guerrilla warfare if necessary. Be warned, you are meeting this fierce combatant in his own element. Beware of twig missiles…
….and acorn grenades!
Thank you very much for helping to defend the backyard from threats to our freedoms, Private Squirrel! For your bravery, service, and sacrifice, you have earned the highest sciurine honor this blog can bestow… you are honorably named as this week’s Saturday Squirrel! Keep fighting the good fight making this little corner of the world a safer place for us all!
Have a great weekend, everyone!