Shelf Critter Advent Calendar – Day 10

It’s everyone’s favorite surprise game short of waiting until you get home to check your drive thru bag from McDonald’s!  The 2019 Shelf Critter Advent Calendar has another tasty treat to offer up since we’ve made it one more day closer to Christmas without the world suddenly ending.  Let’s see if there’s anything perfect about number ten today…

D’awww!  It’s Mary the cute little lamb!  Maybe today we’ll actually have an innocent, family friendly edition of the SCAC…

MARY: And maybe one of these days that bastard Evil Squirrel will let me put breast augmentation on the corporate expense account like he lets Mitzi.  Buuuuuuuuuuuut, I doubt it….

Alrighty then.  So, what does Christmas mean to a big eyed girl like ewe?

MARY: I see what you did there!  Christmas is all about waiting for the visit by Santy Claus!  I remember when I was just a cute little bundle of wool, my Mommy would put out milk and cookies for Santa to eat up after he put our gifts under the tree!  Now that I’m all grown up, I’ve carried on that tradition!

Wow, this might be a wholesome scene after….

MARY: Oh, there you are, Big Boy!  You must be so tired after driving that sleigh all over the world!  I’m fresh out of milk, so I’ll be happy to share my booze with you!  Oh, and I don’t mind if you want to…. you know… lick the icing off this cute little gingerbread lamb who really wants to get eaten up?  I’ll bet you just love us girls on your naughty list, don’t you Santa?

SIGH….. (facepalm) all.

About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
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14 Responses to Shelf Critter Advent Calendar – Day 10

  1. LOVE IT!!! cheers Mary & Santa…Will you share marys thoughts about easter too?

  2. Well at least Mary knows what Santa really needs other than milk and cookies after a rough night of deliveries……booze!

  3. That beautiful face with big eyes doesn’t tell the truth of her true nature. So sad, a little lamb spoiled already in this evil world.

  4. Facepalm indeed! Yikes! So much for innocence.🤦🏼‍♀️

  5. Well *BAM* another illusion shattered. I thought Lambie there was a virgin and the guy in the red suit that allegedly shoots around the world in a single night, dispensing goodies? Was asexual. Um. Yeah.

  6. Awwww…..how can someone so innocent looking be such a naughty girl? Santa likes that I bet! Gets mighty cold in that sleigh – a little lamb blanket over the lap might be nice.

    Pam

  7. draliman says:

    But, but, she looks so cooot and innocent…

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