A couple years ago, back when only a handful of people bothered to read the crap I post on this blog, I whipped up a post celebrating some of the best of the spam comments that akismet doesn’t think anyone should read. It seemed like a good excuse to post something and keep my sarcastic sense of humor sharp by wielding it on people who weren’t around to fight back. Since I’ve been in something of a late Summer posting funk, I figured I’d turn to that treasure trove of nonsense once again and share some of the comments that otherwise would have never seen the light of day on this blog. However, since I always pull for the underdog, I like to call my unwanted comments Treet, after the copycat snotty meat in a can made by Armour, since I always thought it had a cooler name than the real McCoy…
Enjoy your special Treet on this wonderful Sunday!
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Cheap Jimmy Choo Purses wrote:
The ritual of the Daily Brief has been the catalyst for a lot of my work in marketing, blogging and innovation. Most executives I know are information rich, but time poor. So, I often recommend the daily brief as a 20 minute dose of psychological oxygen.
I’m not sure what the “Daily Brief” has to do with manpurses, but as one who often finds himself time rich, but information poor, I’m definitely going to take 20 minutes I’d just waste looking at porn other people’s blogs to check it out. A little psychological oxygen is always good for the brain…
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Find out more about the United Kingdom on Wikipedia wrote:
If you are going for most excellent contents like I do, simply pay a quick visit this site daily siince it presents quality contents, thanks
Well, you’ve totally convinced me to check out that siite! I’d walk a mile along the Information Superhighway to find most excellent contents. Of course, I already read several sites from bloggers in the UK, and am plenty aware they indeed provide quality contents. And sorry, but I learned everything I need to know about the UK from National Lampoon’s European Vacation…
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Personal finance company hours wrote:
Just wish to say your article is as amazing. The clarity in your post is just spectacular and i can assume you are an expert on this subject.
Fine with your permission allow me to grab your feed to keep
updated with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please keep up the enjoyable work.
Like you, I always get a warm, fuzzy feeling when someone compliments me on my writing… especially when they attach their comment to a post like this. I’m not sure if the clarity is quite as great as you say it is, since there was some concern over how Rainbow Donkey was pulling that sign. But yes, I do consider myself to be an expert of possum squishing, thank you! By all means, you have my permission to follow my blog! Even though I know you’d never stop by here again since you never even read the “article” you commented on in the first place, but it’s all about getting to 1,000 followers baby!
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Willard wrote:
I constantly emailed this webpage post page to all mmy contacts,
for the reason tht if like to ead it next mmy contacts will
too.
You, my dear Willard, are a legend among the Treeting community. Not only do you take the time to send nonsensical messages to every blog on earth, but you even make sure to constantly send links for the same blog to all of your contacts as well! You mmust be one popular guy!
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Christian Louboutin Leather Lady Peep Sling 150mm Sandals Rose wrote:
Then you definately can come back at your leisure, at which stage you are going to find that the planes are grounded for lack of fuel and substitute components and military personnel are both occupied controlling riots while in the streets as a result of the collapse of your economy or are off fighting considered one of a great number of raging wars more than no matter what remaining drops of oil are left while in the supply lines. Hell, you may find that the Statue of Liberty has already been destroyed, taking a single item correct off your checklist.six Awesome Martial Arts for Killing a Guy Along with your Bare Hands.
OK, OK, OK!!! I’ll buy whatever it is you’re trying to sell me, then! I wouldn’t want to be responsible for all that bad news just because I wasn’t interested in learning how to kill a man with my bare hands…
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Read up about the Chinese mainland on Wikipedia wrote:
The other day, while I was at work, my cousin stole my iphone and tested to see if it can survive a 40
foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation.
My iPad is now broken and she has 83 views. I
know this is completely off topic but I had to share
it with someone!
So which was it, your iPhone, or your iPad? Is 83 views really that bad? I know I’d love to watch a video of someone’s smartphone getting destroyed, and might even share it on a totally unrelated post on someone else’s blog. Thank you for sharing your completely off topic story with me, though. Speaking of which, that tale also has nothing to do with learning about the Chinese mainland. Why is it my Treeters seem to want me to learn about geography, anyway?
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Botanical slimming soft gel strong version wrote:
Exactly how much botanical slimming soft gel strong version do you need to reduce? A location of the weekly loss purpose of 1lb for each 7 days is nice… moreover eating your exercising calories.
I believe you have just discovered the hottest new weight loss trend! Eating your own calories! Nothing like a tasty bowl of piping hot belly fat to melt those pounds away!
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Win powerball lottery guaranteed wrote:
Terrifoc work! That is the type of info that are meant to be shuared across the internet.
Disgrace on Google forr no longer positioning this post higher!
Come on over and talk over with my web site .
Thanks =)
Wow, thanks a lot! You seem like a really terrifoc person, and I’d much rather talk with you than with your web site, so let me shuare a tip with you. Since you’ve obviously got money coming out the wazoo since you’ve somehow unlocked the secret to winning the lottery, you might want to spend a few bucks on someone who can teach you real English!
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Alejandro wrote:
Asking questions are truly fastidious thing if you
are not understanding something completely,
except this article provides nice understanding even.
Since I have absolutely no understanding of what you are writing about, I’d take the time to ask you a few questions, but since you were complimenting me on this fine article, I’ll just let it go…
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One more before I hit the sack this morning…….
Glutathione peroxidase activity determination wrote:
An oily liver is usually a liver under stress from numerous factors
such as for example misuse of liquor, triglycerides too much,
experience of some drug or toxin. It doesn’t always have that chalky
major aftertaste that nearly every powder does, that makes it delightful for smoothies, and certainly will work well as a food complement
should you choosen’t have time for you to eat breakfast before function or
perhaps too tired to cook. It has many anti-aging gains that are incredibly crucial in getting rid of senile freckles.
OK, that’s good to know. I would never want to have an oily liver, so I’ll be sure to avoid the liquor and toxins. And it’s good to know that an oily liver doesn’t always have a chalky aftertaste and that they make a delightful smoothie…
Wait a minute!!! Exactly what are you trying to suggest here? Human livers as a food compliment? Sorry, but I choosen’t to want anything that came out of someone’s body on my breakfast plate! Even if an oily liver is the miracle cure for those annoying senile freckles we’ve been waiting al our lives for, I’ll pass on your creepy recipe, thankyouverymuch!
I think we all get the same stupid spam, but your responses to them are hilarious. And some of those pictures are just perfect. Do you get the ones where they post pieces of poetry out of context? Very zen. You gave me a lot of good laughs and I will spam you back at the earliest opportunity.
I’m not sure… I have enough trouble recognizing real poetry when I see it, let alone choppy poetry with bad grammar. I look forward to you shuaring your terrifoc spam with me!
maybe the ipad was broken from the 83 views? or someone stepped with a 150mm christian louboutin heel on the display?
and while I wrote this comment, Mr. Michael Kors Hamilton commented on my blog. woooah what a timing. but his real name is Kevin :o)
I get a lot of comments from Mr. Michael as well. He’s practically like an old friend to me, so I hope his cousin never breaks his iDevice…
I can get rid of my freckles! Why didn’t I get this spam treat, er, Treet, before now?
Who knew we would ever develop a cure for freckles? Senile freckles at that. Find yourself an oily liver, and you’ve got it made!
Very funny responses!
At the moment most of my “Treeters” want me to have plastic surgery and retire to “Boca Raton”, whatever that is.
Plastic surgery will do you well when you retire to Boca Raton. It’s a city in Florida which literally translates to “Rat’s Mouth”….
Fucking funny. I’m going to carve myself with a knife and eat myself with a straw, now…then puke it up. Maybe I will weigh 0 lbs at the end.
It must work somehow, or they wouldn’t be able to legally advertise in on blogs across the world! Oh, wait…. they aren’t!
I choosn’t to make dinner often. My oily liver is almost surely due to pub dinners, which are terrifoc! Yes, ES… my Treeters are almost as brightly amusing. My replies, on the other hand, are simple marks to the Treet folder. I clearly lack originaloty.
I think they offer classes on how to talk to Treeters and their web sites. I have a post here with a bunch of hidden links to the online courses around here somewhere….
I always wonder why people waste their times writing programs with are going to stalk websites and leave idiotic comments like this in an effort to get folks to click on links to site that are more than likely loaded with viruses. I mean, what kinda moron clicks on those?
Then, after further thought, I figure that SOMEONE must be visiting those sites otherwise this comments wouldn’t keep coming in. Then my faith in humanity sinks even lower.
I think it’s probably one really stupid person who keeps them in business. The Most Gullible Man in the World…
terrifoc nay, hilarious post. he’s a doctor not a spammer! 😀
Bones! Fetch me the oily liver of an ensign! Must…. get rid…. of these…… FRECKLES!
HaHa Ha HA!!!
I lovee your blog, please taken the time to viisit mine.
I try and can to see the other excellent contents of my freinds tommorroww. Talk to your web site then!
Yes, exactly, and I know this is off usual but my site I think looks bad mobil could you help me maybe with tips or comments re your tarifik site!
You neeed more contents about skunks. Skunks provide seo optimization with Goooogle and peoples love shuaring their storries…
Your Treets trump my Spam. I bow to your superior ability to garner such comments. Delightful.
I’m not sure how I find all of the dandies of the internet… I guess they think I’m just as messed up as they are!