The Fourth Annual Contest Of Whatever!

You could win fabulous cash and prizes!!!  Well, OK, prizes.... that are sort of fabulous...

You could win fabulous cash and prizes!!! Well, OK, prizes…. that are sort of fabulous…

It’s that time of the year when The Nest looks to its readers to supply the fucked up humor by tapping into those creativity reserves we all have somewhere inside our craniums.  Today kicks off everyone’s favorite February tradition, The Contest of Whatever! (Click the link to see the CoW’s history)  Since 2014, bloggers just like you have competed for the chance to pick something out of my Cafepress shop just by using their imaginations… and we’re ready again to find ourselves another pair of winners in 2017!

Top that, BEYOTCH!

Top that, BEYOTCH!

Normally, I provide a couple key elements that must appear in your entry while allowing you the freedom to use pretty much any creative media imaginable to pull it off.  Like how in the inaugural CoW your submission had to contain each of a squirrel, a possum and a unicorn…

This would have been a valid entry in the 2014 CoW.... if it made any sense.

This would have been a valid entry in the 2014 CoW…. if it made any sense.

This year, however, I’m leaving the content part of the creation wide open while restricting the exact format I’d like you to use.  And if it isn’t obvious from the images I’ve used so far in this post, the theme for the 2017 Contest of Whatever is going to be The Nest’s newest weekly feature, Shelf Critter Theatre!  I have had a lot of fun breathing bizarre personalities into otherwise lifeless objects and having them interact with each other in stupid ways for the past few months.  And now, I want you to do the same!

Time to get out your glasses to read the fine print...

Time to get out your glasses to read the fine print…

So, here are the official rules for this year’s contest:

1: Pick out multiple (at least two, but as many as you need/wish) inanimate objects you have lying around and anthropomorphize them…. that is, give them a personality and have them engage in a short play of your own creation.  Please include at least one photo of the story’s characters “acting out” a scene from your tale (though you are free to include as many as you wish to tell the story).

2: At least one of your primary characters needs to be an object that is NOT a representation of a well known real or fictional figure.

I'm confused.  How 'bout we just party down instead?

I’m confused. How ’bout we just party down instead?

To clarify the second point… well-known representations of characters would be like my My Little Pony figurines of trademarked characters, Santa Claus, Snuggle Bear, even Buster and Rainbow Donkey whose SCT personalities are largely borrowed from my comic.  The reason I’m including this restriction is that these are generally figures that already have well defined personality traits.  While you are welcome to include these kinds of characters in your entry… you just need to make sure at least one of them is a completely original “character” you create a personality for from scratch…

Mitzi and Troll would be examples of characters I created completely on my own... and will no doubt haunt me on any psychological evaluation I ever have to undergo.

Mitzi and Troll would be examples of characters I created completely on my own… and their personalities I prescribed to them will no doubt haunt me on any psychological evaluation I ever have to undergo.

Simply post your completed entry on your blog sometime between right now and Thursday March 2, 2017 at noon Central Standard Time (UTC -6).  Please include a link to THIS POST somewhere in your entry so I’ll get a Pingback (of course, you are also welcome to notify me in the comments if you’re afraid the pingback will die in WordPress purgatory somewhere)…

OK, that’s not too hard…. is it?

I hope I'm not making your head hurt....

I hope I’m not making your head hurt….

As usual, there will be two winners crowned at the end of the contest.  I will choose one winner on merit based on the simple criteria of whatever entry I like best.  Once that winner is chosen, all other entries will be placed in a random drawing to find the second winner.  Yes, as always, even if you think your imagination sucks giant possum balls (and it’s probably not as bad as you think it is)… you can still be a winner in the Contest of Whatever!!!



Each of the two winners will be allowed to choose a prize from my Cafepress Shop valued at $20 USD or less.  I will try to add a few more things to the shop before the contest is over, and rather simple requests for custom content by any of the winners will be considered.  All completed entries will be posted here for all to see on Friday March 3rd, and I plan to announce the winners on Sunday March 5th.

Pick me!  Pick me!

Pick me! Pick me!

So, are you up for the challenge?  Let’s see if we can finally top the record of 11 entries from the very first CoW this year (Psst!  Spread the word!).  Good luck, have fun, and get creating!!!

Bribes now being accepted (wink, wink)...

Bribes now being accepted (wink, wink)…


About evilsquirrel13

Bored former 30-something who has nothing better to do with his life than draw cartoon squirrels.
This entry was posted in Squirrel Droppings and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

44 Responses to The Fourth Annual Contest Of Whatever!

  1. count me in… I have such a character… it is the perfect one for this challenge :o)

  2. draliman says:

    Thinking cap on standby…

  3. Ally Bean says:

    I was thinking about your contest earlier this week. I like your idea this year. Will see if I can find Fred and Sandrine to see if they’d like to make a return engagement in this contest. Not sure where they are exactly, but…

  4. Trisha says:

    I love this idea! Looking around, I already see a few characters I can use; a squirrel figurine, a metal bird, a Hello Kitty flash drive and a goofy Happy Meal toy from 10-15 years ago. A few more and I’ve got a cast. This is going to be fun!

  5. I’m going to try to do this. It’s not my forte exactly, but Garry is forever messing with the dogs’ stuffies to make scenes that the dawgz can then destroy. i suspect all I will have to do is take the pictures. It will also inspire me to sew up the holes in poor Squirrel, Blue Starfish, and Mistuh Moose. All waiting in the ER for mom and her sewing kit to restore them to life. Perhaps that will be the storyline.

  6. I might actually be able to do this one with existing photographs of my gnome!

  7. I can’t believe I missed this yesterday. OMG this is going to be fun, and exceptionally weird for everyone.

  8. Merbear74 says:

    I got this…I need a new RD mug anyway. 😀

  9. Quirky Girl says:

    Sounds like fun!

    On a side note, those ponies sure know how to party! 😀

  10. Ladybuggz says:
    OK Done!! that was fun! Check it out…… I called it Shelf Kritter Theater @ Ladybuggz House

  11. Pingback: The FOURTH ANNUAL CLOWNTEST OF… | Easy Blog

  12. Early tomorrow morning, be read for … AMBUSH AT FURRY TOYS PASS! It will be Serendipity’s first entry into the 4th annual contest of whatever. With Lyrics by Garry Armstrong, Illustrations by Marilyn Armstrong. Sheer, senseless violence by Bonnie and Gibbs, outlaws and terrorists. Just saying.

  13. READY for, READY not READ … me and typos.


  15. Working on it with Little Guy. Arefurry “live actors” permitted??!

  16. Pingback: 4th Annual Contest of Whatever | jennsmidlifecrisis

  17. franhunne4u says:

    I have an idea and I have the props and the critters … the only thing I am not too fond of is I have to take photos and upload them – and I do not have a paid for account – the number of photos for me is limiited .. but I think I will upload a contribution. Some sword and sorcery story showing strong sailors, skulls and stars … 😉

  18. Pingback: Vampire Diary: Shelf Critter Theater | Vampire Maman

  19. This is my entry. Holy shit ES. This is the craziest thing I think I’ve put on my blog, and you know I’ve posted some pretty crazy things. Vlad says hello.

  20. Pingback: Evil Squirrel’s Competition – Grandpaw’s Story | draliman on life

  21. Holly says:

    Oooh, Umbreon!

  22. “I have had a lot of fun breathing bizarre personalities into otherwise lifeless objects and having them interact with each other in stupid ways for the past few months.” I do this all the time with no prompts at all! Saw Mer’s entry and so glad I am not too late. Going to get the Things to help me out on this.

    Also heard Sparkle Pony is showing up in your theater too, so I’ll make sure I haven’t missed her appearances. Won’t someone think of the sponkicorns?

  23. Pingback: It Takes a Village – An Episode of Shelf Critter Theatre – Shedding Light

  24. Trisha says:

    Dammit, I don’t see my pingback here. Here’s a link: I hope I made it in time!

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