On the third day of Shelfmas, the critters gave to me…
Three French…. words.
SANTA: Just three!?!? George Carlin said there were seven of them, and that ain’t even close to enough profanity to get me through this fucking holiday!
SEYMOUR: (blushing) Santa! You need to mind your French! There are children out there!
SANTA: The children can kiss my big elfish ass! Besides, I know what kind of shitty music they’ve been asking for, so I’m pretty sure those little bastards already know all the goddamned naughty words!
SCRAT THE RED NOSED SQUIRRELDEER: SQUEEEEEEEEEALLLLLLL!!!!!!
SANTA: Now there’s something that should be fucking censored from our tender ears!