Category Archives: Shelf Critter Theatre

Alternate History

TV ANNOUNCER: And now to satisfy our government mandated weekly hour of educational programming, Shelf TV Public Access Channel 69 presents another obtuse episode of I’m Smarter Than You Are, with your pompous host, Shadow the Umbreon! SHADOW: Thank you, … Continue reading

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Boomsday

UNCLE SAM: My fellow Amurricans, it’s that time of year where we celebrate our freedom and independence the only way that’s appropriate on the greatest shelf in the world….. by blowing shit up!!!!  Troll!  Let’s get this show started! RAINY: … Continue reading

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An Eye For An Eye

CHIP: Oh, hey Buster!  How’s life been treating you? BUSTER: Oh, I can’t complain, Chip!  Just living my usual charmed life! CHIP: Wait a minute…. Buster!!! CHIP: Has Evil Squirrel still not fixed your loose eye!?!? BUSTER: Oh, he apparently … Continue reading

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Calendar Of Critters

SQUIRREL CHILDREN: Uncle Hung!  Uncle Hung!!!! HUNG LO: Sorry, Hung Lo’s buffet not offer kid’s menu.  Maybe kids ON menu… SQUIRREL CHILD 1: We’re BORED!!! CHILD 2: Tell us a Chinese story Uncle Hung! CHILD 3; Yeah!  About dragons and … Continue reading

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It’s A Wonderful Shelf

It’s Christmas Eve.  Evil Squirrel, President and CEO of Shelf Critter Theatre, LLC, looks over a bridge and ponders his misfortune… EVIL SQUIRREL: Ten years now I’ve been trying to make a name for myself.  I drew comics.  I made … Continue reading

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